 Episode 3: This is an ode to all cyclocrossers
LOCATION: just outside Pau, France. TIME: 0930. WEATHER: snoooooow. MISSION: Spy on cyclists. *RANDOM TECHNO BABBLE TO MAKE IT SOUND LIKE A SPY THRILLER GOES HERE*
”Okay, so let me get this straight: We are going to race several charity races across Europe?”
”Jah” answered Hushovd
”Including a velodrome? And ive never been in a velodrome before.”
Chavanel nodded
”So really, its a tour designed by the ”unmentionable” authorities to kill and/or injure me?”
”Boards dont hit back” said the unnamed extra who was just standing there, minding his own business when our three heroes held a break from their cycling.
”Ivan, really. Dont be so afraid of the track. Its not dangerous, its fun! I mean, how many have been seriously injured or killed in a velodrome for the past 5 years? Thor?” Chavanel with his best french intents asked.
”Firteen” Hushovd nodded.
”Dont use math Thor. Its counter-revolutionary and all that. Now, can we get riding again? I cant feel my legs when its so cold” Basso said in a very impatient italian stallion way.
LOCATION: Long downhill road outside Pau, France. TIME: 0938. WEATHER: Icy roads. MISSION: Still spy on those stupid cyclists. *oh and WAR IS PEACE FREEDOM IS SLAVERY IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH you understand that?*
Our three heroes very casually minding their own business when riding along a twisty, long, treacherous, icy, slippery, incredible dangerous and in all ways lethal road.
”Hey, do eny of ju hear e funneh noise?” Hushovd asked.
And they did hear a funny noise. It sounded an angry squirell that was cursing some nuts that wouldnt break. The noise came closer and closer until they could hear some words... Some known words... Some dreadful words that truly meant doom for anyone who heard them...
”Venga venga venga venga! Venga venga venga! VEEEEEENGA! VEEENGAAAAAA!!!!”
”Oh no” - Basso sighed
”Oh crap” - Chavanel and Basso said with fear in their voices
Hushovd just didnt care.
OH MY GOD ITS...
OH...
OOOHHHHHH...
In the next episode: A thrilling chase/action/disaster movie scene! |
