 IVAN BASSO!
DAMI-ANNO CUNEGO!
IVAN BASSO!
DAMI-ANNO CUNEGO!
…
…
Dawn had risen on the second day in the month of December. Basso and Hushovd had not slept. Our yet unnamed French man had. Sorta.
”Merry Christmas, idiots,” Frenchie put in sarcastically.
”No... Merry Cunegomas...” Hushovd tiredly put in.
”No... Merry Bassomasso!” the person that is not Hushovd said.
”You two... Let's go biking...” said frenchie
”Only if you tell us your name,” Basso said. ”Nuh uh,” was somehow the only thing Hushovd said.
”Mijn naam es Boonen, Tom Boonen!” said Tom Boonen
”And that stupid guy is Ivan Basso, ha!” Hushovd said, and he kept laughing for the next few seconds until Tom Boonen said the following immortal words:
”How would you know? You've only seen him from behind in your entire career!”
”YOU ARE GOIN' HOME IN'NA AMBULANS!” and guess who said that...
So Tom Boonen had his head ducked into a toilet bowl and after several minutes of ”homeland security interrogation”, he admitted he was ”just” Sylvain Chavanel. In a fit of irony, ”Chavanel” is Latin slang for being quite ostentatiously. Whatever that means.
Sometime later, quite a lot later actually. Like a evening later or so. Our three merry cyclists were eating dinner in a restaurant located convieniently close to the room they resided in. Basso had ”Duck Surprise”, Chavanel had mystery meat (which is Duck Surprise, but without the duck) and Hushovd had one of everything on the menu.
”So whats the surprise in chicken surprise?” asked a confused looking Basso.
”Its either raw chicken or pork painted orange,” answered a bruised Chavanel.
”Nom nom nom munch glomp slurp munch,” added Hushovd.
Basso looked carefree when he said: ”You know Sylvain... I really think you are a pansy for not beating up Thor when you had the chance. I can't imagine just giving up like that and having your a...”. He did not get a chance to finish his words before Sylvain threw his mystery meat straight into Basso's face. Basso in response, threw his raw chicken surprise straight into the mountain of food Hushovd had assembled. Within 30 seconds, Ivan Basso became the next victim who survived having a huge full grown Norwegian male ducking his head into the toilet bowl.
In the next episode: Will the author ever finish an episode before 8PM CET? What does ostentatiously mean? Does it have any relation with the latin words ”Mea Culpa”? Does this have a plot? Where is the Christmas theme? All of this will get answered in the next episode. Or the one following it. Or the next one again.
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