(24th July 2024 - Recogne, Belgium) In the small village of Recogne, Belgium, in the heart of the Ardennes region, a crowd had gathered at 5pm in the village hall to witness a ceremony that had been advertised in the local papers and around the village for weeks.

Behind a long table, draped with a white table cloth reaching to the floor, sat two men and one woman, all dressed in sharp business attire. In the centre, a small-ish, balding man of approximately 40 years with the placecard reading "Jean Wauters, Directeur Sportif" in front of him. To his left, a blonde woman with thick glasses and a placecard reading "Duvel VP Marketing", and to the right, a tall East Asian man with jet black hair and the placecard, "Tsingtao SVP Europe Region".

The table was nearly filled with microphones and recorders set up in front of the three speakers, and five TV stations had sent producers to take in the scene, setting up cameras on tripods around the hall, not much larger than a typical courtroom.

To the locals congregated in the village hall, it was an unusual sight for the normally sleepy village, not known for attracting many tourists or media attention.

With a brusk clearing of his throat, Jean Wauters smiled and began speaking. "We are gathered here today in the Ardennes, one of the premier locations for cycling in Belgium, to announce the formation of a new cycling team that we hope will bring joy to the public, and pride to our communities."

"You will notice I have on either side of me, representatives from the two main sponsors of this new team, Duvel and Tsingtao. We are delighted to have the team backed by two giants of beer and we aim to deliver a product in cycling that is both pleasing to the eye and smooth going down," winked Mr. Wauters.

"But listen to me going on! I know you'll all be wanting to get on with the party, so please allow us to share with you the official news that this new team, which will be headquartered in Recogne, is called Duvel-Tsingtao and will be competing in the Continental Division in the 2024 season. The team will be made up of riders with a variety of specialisations, to be competitive in this very challenging division. And lastly, Duvel-Tsingtao will be donning this wonderful jersey, designed by Ezeefreak."

An assistant walked up to the table, carrying a shirt box. The Duvel and Tsingtao representatives opened the box and lift up the jersey, attracting the flash of cameras and some murmuring in the crowd.

Jean Wauters continued: "As you can see, this jersey is a reflection of the joie de vivre of our sponsors and indeed, of the directeurs of this team. The golden hue of the hops leading up into the shadow of the foam, with the prominent red colour paying homage to our Belgian and Chinese sponsors. This team is about camaraderie across continents, across cultures, with a passion for winning. Our team's motto is Nunc est Bibendum, which means 'now is the time to drink'.

With those words, from under the table Jean Wauters and the two shadowing representatives pulled out steins filled with beer and foam. They shouted 'Sante!', clinked their glasses and started chugging the refreshments. For this reporter, it was a surreal moment.

The press conference broke up thereafter and the gathering locals proceeded to make their way to the open bar, paid for and supplied with a mixture of Duvel and Tsingtao brand beers. Thankfully no cyclists were in the room for the post-press conference festivities, as the caloric intake for the average attendee constituted a weekly dietary plan for a Continental Division rider.

Though the fanfare and choreography of the Duvel-Tsingtao press conference made for an event the village of Recogne won't be forgetting anytime soon, there are a number of questions outstanding as to the motives of the sponsors of this team, aside from encouraging the numbers of Alcoholics Anonymous. Jean Wauters' prepared remarks, while jovial, were very short of details and leave many questions unanswered.

From L'Ardennais, this is your reporter signing off - Arnaud Lambert

*We pay half of Egger's total €60,000 wage
**We pay €100,000 of Brenner's €245,000 wage
***We pay half of Van Tricht's €50,000 wage

@Nemolito - Ezee is an absolute star with the kit, I think it'll be not only distinctive but give our riders the motivation they need, knowing that their beer bonus is waiting for them at the finish with a good result

@AbhishekLFC - In writing out your name, I didn't realise but perhaps you're a Liverpool fan? If so, commiserations for your loss of Klopp, hopefully Slot is a good replacement. If not, ignore me

I'm looking forward to the competition, but hopefully I can manage a success or two against you for a key rider.

@jandal7 - So good to be back, and hoping to get into your division in a couple years I guess (we can all have goals, right?!) so we can reignite the friendly feuding. I hope Joseph Areruya has made you happy over the years, he certainly gave me some fits in PCT. I've gone a little less political with this backstory than with Kulczyk, but still want to let the good vibes roll with some light alcoholism involved.

@Aycon97 - This looks a much more competitive CT division than my last experience, last time I only had to compete against Abhi and jandal, so a win was pretty much a foregone conclusion (joking of course, there were some excellent managers in that 2017 class including whitejersey's Goldcorp, Aquarius' Repsol-Honda and ryant who I see has even made it up to PT!) I wouldn't be too worried about experience, the rust is deeply embedded in this one, and the riders will be subsisting on a diet of booze and cigarettes.

@DarkWolf - Thanks matey, just Carlsberg to compete against, if I have that right? I'd easily neck down a good Duvel anyday

@Fabianski - Thank you sir, some more details to follow on why the combination has been made, but you're right that Duvel is a smooth one. That and Delirium for me in terms of the Belgian blondes, but the thinking is that we'd rather our riders not get the wrong idea that being delirious is the right state of mind for our CT prep. Thanks for the luck, we'll need it looking at this crop of managers!

Booker wrote:
@DarkWolf - Thanks matey, just Carlsberg to compete against, if I have that right? I'd easily neck down a good Duvel anyday

Fabianski wrote:
Ethiopian Airlines have Tusker, I believe as a nutrition sponsor?