After my first attempt to write a story ended in me giving up (too much work), I now have discovered the game a bit, so now I'll try to write a second story.
Newsflash
Düsseldorf, Germany.
Thyssenkrupp AG wants to sponsor a brand new, mainly German cycling team
ThyssenKrupp AG is a large German industrial conglomerate, with almost 200,000 employees. But most people have never heard of Thyssenkrupp yet. That's why our company wants to sponsor a cycling team, which will contain many German riders.
We want people to know what company Thyssenkrupp is, that's why we've chosen to sponsor a cycling team, because those races get much airtime on TV.
Obviously, our team will have many German riders, but we also like to penetrate the markets in Danmark and Austria and eventually Switzerland. That's why we'd like to sign some Danish and Austrian cyclists too.
Our company hopes that the team will be a ProTour team in a few years, and grow out to a strong, solid cycling team, unlike Team Milram, with who we'll laugh hard during the season, seen as we'll kick their b*ts'.
Kind Regards,
CEO of Thyssenkrupp, Herr Meerschweinchen.
Thyssenkrupp AG, the company that's in charge of the cycling team in the premature stadia, has found two secondary sponsors.
With proud, they present to the whole cyclingworld, the two secondary sponsors who'll help them to make the Thyssenkrupp cycling team a well-known and feared name!
Merck KGaA is a German chemical and pharmaceutical company. Merck, also known as “German Merck” and “Merck Darmstadt”, was founded in Darmstadt, Germany. Merck was very interested in sponsoring a new team. Their main reason was that they now are sure they'll sponsor a German elite team (that's why you didn't got Merck as sponsor, Milram...), and to gain some more attention for their brands.
Buy your Calbiochem Biochemicals and Reagents from Merck!!
Logo:
The third sponsor that has been found, is Uniqa. Uniqa will take care of the Austrian side of the team, seen as Uniqa is an Austrian insurance company. Uniqa hopes that their money will return into good results.
Logo:
Die Versicherung einer neuen Generation!
So, the cycling team has now three sponsors, now the curious cycling fans will have to wait untill the first signings are announced.
Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam keeps the provisional team roster secret
In an interview, Thyssenkrupp's CEO, Herr Meerschweinchen told the press that the current squadnames won't be released in the near future. He also didn't want to say who has signed or who will sign for the new German team.
'Time will tell', and having said this Herr Meerschweinchen left the press conference.
And so remains the question, who'll be riding for this team? A team that will obviously be better then Team Milram.
Will the experienced Andreas Klöden leave the Shack to join this German prestige project? Or Martin Reimer, the rising star of German cycling, who's already won the German roadrace national championship? Or Linus Gerdemann, who's riding for Team Milram, and obviously wants to leave that amateuristic team? Or... ?
As Herr Meerschweinchen said, time will tell...
I may look happy, but honestly dear. The only way I'll really smile is if you cut me ear to ear
Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam will announce the first four signings the day after tomorrow
Thyssenkrupp's CEO revealed in a press conference that the first four names who have signed will be pubished within a few days.
Herr Meerschweinchen didn't want to answer any questions concerning the future signings so he leaves the conference room in his well-known style.
'Study the past if you would define the future.'
When having this said, he leaves the press room and the journalists leave too, without knowing anything more than when they came in.
Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam publishes first four signings
Herr Meerschweinchen has arranged a press conference in which he'll reveale the first four signings for the Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam.
For those who have been living under a rock the last few months, Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam is a new, prestiguous German cycling project. It's main goal is to get whole the world forget about the miserable German ProTour cycling team, Team Milram. The team has been hyped by the media since the announcement made by Thyssenkrupp AG, in which they said they would sponsor a new cycling project.
The CEO of Thyssenkrupp has immersed the team with a mysterious sphere. Nobody knew exactly what was going to happen with the team, nobody was sure if the team would even really exist...
But now, the Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam has announced their first four signings!
1) Finn Ratajczak, GER, 19 y.
Finn is a young German climber with potential. He's got a real fighter mentality and is able to ride a good downhill.
2) Eduard Thiesen, GER, 19y.
Eduard is also German, the team hopes he'll grow out to a good puncheur and luxury teammate.
3) Paul Wendt, GER, 18y.
Paul is a promising time trialist with a good fighter mentality.
4) Kurt Walbröhl, GER, 20y.
Kurt is a real fighter who's able to ride a good downhill.
These four signings show us that Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam is a project that'll mostly focus on young, promising riders and give them a professional accompanimant.
And Herr Meerschweinchen indicates that this is the end of the press conference, in his own style.
'Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart.'
I may look happy, but honestly dear. The only way I'll really smile is if you cut me ear to ear
Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam presents next four riders
The face of Herr Meerschweinchen is getting familiar. We've seen him many times the last few months, and it looks like he's enjoying the media attention he gets. He's called us together because he'd like to present to us, journalists, the next four riders of his team. I hope we get some big shots now, and not some unknown, young riders, but yea, let's see...
1) Ingolf Preuhs, GER, 20y.
Ingolf has a fighter mentality who's able to keep up an effort. He's also able to ride a good time trial.
2) Markus Pleß, GER, 18y.
Markus is a promising time trialist with a good fighter mentality and able to ride a good downhill.
3) Max Lotter, GER, 20y.
Max is a bit the same like Markus, a promising time trialist with a great fighter mentality.
4) Sepp Bohla, GER, 18y.
The team hopes that Sepp ameliorates his cobblestones talent. If he's able to do that, our team could have a potential RvV or P-R winner!
*Sigh* Again, 4 rather unknown riders. What's wrong with that Herr Meerschweinchen? Is his budget too small for a real big fish or what? Hope he doesn't let us come for nothing the next time...
And oh yes, he finishes the press conference again, with one or another silly sentence.
'He who speaks without modesty will find it difficult to make his words good.'
I may look happy, but honestly dear. The only way I'll really smile is if you cut me ear to ear
(That nitwit of a Meerschweinchen) -Gotta stay professional!- Herr Meerschweinchen reveales four other names.
I swear to God that this will be my last press conference held by that ignoramus CEO if he doesn't publish any known names...
1) Martin Hietkamp, GER 18y.
(This is going to be my last press conference!!)
Martin is a rider with a great fighter mentality who's able to ride a good ITT too.
2) Cléments Frankhauser, AUT, 24y.
Cléments previous pro team was the Vorarlberg-Corratec team. Cléments is a very decent sprinter who'll be a great lead-out man for the sprinter we hopefully sign in the next few days. Other than that, Cléments is also able to get over some mountains and hills, but when it becomes too steap, he'll probably will have to let the better climbers go.
3) Stefan Denifl, AUT, 22y.
Stefan is a young, Austrian cyclist who's specialised in stage races. If he's able to improve his climbing and recuperation, he might be a future GC contender in the three big tours!
Stefan is the former Austrian national champ in the ITT and he comes from Cervélo TestTeam.
4) Marcel Kittel, GER, 21y.
Do I need to introduce this rider? Well, I have to, just pro forma.
Marcel has been the rising star of the German cycling since he's won the World Titel for juniors in the ITT in 2005. Obviously, he's able to ride a good time trial, but he's also a rather good sprinter, who will take his place in our sprinters train. Marcel comes from the Thüringer Energie Team.
Marcel's previous wins:
World champion in the ITT for juniors: 2005 & 2006.
European champion in the ITT U23: 2009.
National champion in the ITT for juniors: 2006.
National champion in the ITT U23: 2007 & 2010.
Well, okay, this will probably not my last press conference lead by Herr Cavia (Meerschweinchen is German for Cavia, haha), seen as he now has signed some very promising riders for his team. I can't wait untill he presents his really big shots!
'Have no friends not equal to yourself.'
I may look happy, but honestly dear. The only way I'll really smile is if you cut me ear to ear
Three more riders have signed for Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam
The three riders are: Chris A. Sørensen, Lars Y. Bak and Markus Eibegger.
1) Chris Anker Sørensen, DAN, 25y.
Chris is well known as a decent climber with a good fighter mentality. He's also able to get over hills with the better hilly riders, so he's a great gain for the team!
Chris comes from Team Saxo Bank.
His major victory was the 8th stage in the Giro d'Italia 2010.
2) Lars Ytting Bak, DAN, 29y.
Lars is one of the most complete all-rounders of the peloton. His speciality is time trialling, but he also competes with the beter riders in climbing, on the more hilly roads and on cobbled sections. Link this with a fighter mentality and you got a very decent rider for this team! With his 29 years, Lars'll probably be the oldest rider of the team, so his experience will be very important for the younger riders!
Lars comes from Team HTC-Columbia.
His previous wins:
National champion on the road: 2005.
National champion in the ITT: 2005, 2007, 2008, 2009.
3) Markus Eibegger, AUT, 25y.
Markus has been signed because of his good puncheur qualities. He is a rather good climber and one of the better riders when it comes to hilly races. Markus will be the leader of the puncheurs in the squad, given as he's got the most experience of them.
Markus comes from Footon-Servetto-Fuji.
His previous wins:
National champion on the road U23: 2005.
National champion in the ITT U23: 2005.
National champion on the road: 2009
Having signed these three very good riders, the CEO, Herr Cavia is confident that he'll sign even some more big names! We will find that out in the future, and be sure that our newspaper will be the first one to report when that big name is signed!
And oh yes, Herr Cavia's got one final thing to say, again... It's getting boring, don't you think?
'By nature, men are nearly alike; by practice, they get to be wide apart.'
Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam has signed their last three riders.
Herr Cavia has announced in an interview with Forbes that the final three signings have been made. He didn't said anything more than that, and eventhough the interviewer tried to get some more information about the last three men, the interviewee didn't said a single word when it came to the signings.
So we don't know anything more than that, except that these three riders will be the last signings. So, let's the speculation begin!
Could it be that Fabian Wegmann is one of the final signings? Wegmann is the former German RR national champion and is currently riding for Team Milram, which could be a disadvantage... Or could it be that Sebastian Lang is one of the signings? Sebastian is the former German ITT national champion, and he could be a reinforcement for the team, because he's a good time trialist. Which is an advantage for him is that he never rode for Team Milram!
So, we just have to wait untill our beloved (humhum) Herr Cavia publishes the last names...
And guess what... There he is again, with one of his silly phrases.
'It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.'
I may look happy, but honestly dear. The only way I'll really smile is if you cut me ear to ear
Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam reveales one of the names
In an announcement, Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam has published one of the three last signings. His name is...
Jakob Fuglsang!
Jakob Fuglsang, DAN, 24y.
Jakob is a strong Danish climber who's also able to ride a good downhill and a time trial and he gets over some hills too. A real mountain goat if you ask me, great signing!
Jakob comes from Team Saxo Bank.
So, with this announcement, Thyssenkrupp has revealed the first big shot. I can say that this is a good signing concerning the future, if Jakob is able to ameliorate his abilities, he might become a real GC contender in one of the three big GT's!
'Forget injuries, never forget kindnesses.'
Oh, shut up you Cavia...
In a press conference, Herr Cavia has revealed the last two names who have signed for the team.
'With great pride and very proud, I'd like to introduce to you all, the final two signings of the Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam, who'll be teamleaders, together with Jakob. It took much efforts to get them signing here, but in the end, both of them did, so I'm very glad! The cycling team is now at it's best and will have a brilliant season, I'm sure of that!'
1) Gerald Ciolek, GER, 23y.
Gerald comes from Team Milram. Luckily that he's so young, so it was just youthful ignorance... Now, he has seen the light, and left that crappy "ProTour" team.
Gerald will be our main sprinter this season. I hope he can get us lots of wins in the continental circuit, which shouldn't be a big problem, because Gerald is one of the most talented sprinters tout court.
Geralds previous wins:
National champion on the road: 2005
World champion on the road U23: 2006
2nd stage of the Vuelta 2009
2) Tony Martin, GER, 24y.
Despite he's still a bit young, Tony is already the star of the team! That's not a surprise, because since he became pro, Tony has been one of the most promising German cyclists since Jan Ulrich! Tony is one of the best time triallists in the world, but he can also climb with the betters and get over some hills too, link this with a good recuperation ability, and you get: A future GC winner! I hope Tony can make it...
Tony comes from Team HTC-Columbia.
His previous wins:
National champion ITT for juniors: 2003.
National champion ITT U23: 2006.
2nd and 21th stage of the Giro d'Italia: 2008.
Bronze medal on the World Championships ITT: 2009.
'I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.'
Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam presents its team jersey for season 2010
The jersey has been made by the shirt manufactoring company RAZ. All the three main sponsors are very visible on this beautiful shirt in which your beloved team will be riding the upcoming season!
Thanks to Raz for this jersey.
I may look happy, but honestly dear. The only way I'll really smile is if you cut me ear to ear
The 37 year old German Stefan Bauchschmerzen is going to be the manager of the Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam. That's quite a shock, because Bauchschmerzen is a rather unknown name in the cycling world. But yea, they didn't got much budget left after signing their riders, I guess...
I may look happy, but honestly dear. The only way I'll really smile is if you cut me ear to ear
So here I am, Stefan Bauchschmerzen, in the lead of Thyssenkrupp CyclingTeam... It's a dream that has come true, being in the lead of a cycling team! First of all, I should get to know my cyclists. I hope that that won't be a too big problem...
I decided to send them all to a training camp to build up some early season condition.
Meanwhile, I'll search for some extra sponsors and try to build up a calendar. I've just finished the january calendar.
As you can see, the only race for my team in january will be the Tour de San Luis, I hope we can get some results there!
Edited by n30k on 03-08-2010 16:48
I may look happy, but honestly dear. The only way I'll really smile is if you cut me ear to ear
