The Two of Us | Chapter 3
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TimoCycling |
Posted on 11-06-2014 19:46
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Sprinter
Posts: 1765
Joined: 27-08-2012
PCM$: 200.00
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Brilliant posts! |
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VoetsT |
Posted on 11-06-2014 20:14
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Breakaway Specialist
Posts: 851
Joined: 29-06-2013
PCM$: 200.00
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Exciting
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547984 |
Posted on 11-06-2014 23:40
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Grand Tour Specialist
Posts: 5008
Joined: 29-01-2013
PCM$: 200.00
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Hey Joseph, blame Obam.....wait no it's Hilla.....wait no who is the president now!
baseballlover312, 06-03-14 : "Nuke Moscow...Don't worry Russia, we've got plenty of love to go around your cities"
Sarah Palin, 08-03-14 (CPAC, on Russian aggression) : "The only thing that stops a bad guy with a nuke is a good guy with a nuke"
Big thanks to jdog for making this AMAZING userbar!
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Ad Bot |
Posted on 22-11-2024 23:15
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Bot Agent
Posts: Countless
Joined: 23.11.09
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IP: None |
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Jakstar22 |
Posted on 11-06-2014 23:43
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Team Leader
Posts: 7294
Joined: 11-04-2012
PCM$: 200.00
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What a great page!!!! That was a great read!!
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Mresuperstar |
Posted on 12-06-2014 00:09
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Grand Tour Champion
Posts: 8058
Joined: 22-06-2009
PCM$: 650.00
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@sutty68: Exactly. Joseph is sick of getting the run around.
@BBL: Martial1 did.
@Martial1:
@TimoCycling & Jakstar22: Thanks!
@547984: 2034 so, yeah... Got to say that I might have correctly predicted Hillary becoming President after Obama though.
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Ian Butler |
Posted on 12-06-2014 09:34
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Tour de France Champion
Posts: 21854
Joined: 01-05-2012
PCM$: 400.00
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Down the rabbit hole. (...)
Silence at the table.
Neither had spoken a word in ten minutes.
I looked over at my dad. He was a shade of his former self.
A World Champion.
We used to get along so well.
But everything went to shit when Alice died.
My dad said it was my fault...
The war had left scars on everyone. Our scars were two graves.
And now it was just the two of us left. Me and my dad.
We used to be such a great team together.
I looked across the table. "Dad?" I started. He turned to me.
But I was struggling for more words. I sighed.
"Never mind."
Edited by Mresuperstar on 13-06-2014 12:00
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VoetsT |
Posted on 12-06-2014 09:44
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Breakaway Specialist
Posts: 851
Joined: 29-06-2013
PCM$: 200.00
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Curious to find out what happened there
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cunego59 |
Posted on 12-06-2014 11:07
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Team Manager
Posts: 6508
Joined: 14-09-2008
PCM$: 1090.00
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I think you need to be a little cautious that this doesn't get "overly dramatic". Two broken father-son relationships, a few dead people ... Don't get me wrong, your writing and the way you're presenting it is great and there's a lot of potential, I just fear that if it's one traumatic event after another, it may lose its touch, if you know what I mean But I'm sure you're going to handle that well.
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Martial1 |
Posted on 12-06-2014 11:34
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Neo-Pro
Posts: 388
Joined: 30-04-2014
PCM$: 200.00
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I like how Travis and Henry and their sons have ended up in similar scenarios, even though their careers took opposite paths.
Oh, and great page btw. |
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Shonak |
Posted on 12-06-2014 12:29
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Tour de France Champion
Posts: 15615
Joined: 16-07-2013
PCM$: 350.00
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Two heavy chapters there, looks like Travis and Henry both suffered through the war.
"It’s a little bit scary when Contador attacks." - Tommy V
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sutty68 |
Posted on 12-06-2014 14:42
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Tour de France Champion
Posts: 34654
Joined: 22-08-2010
PCM$: 200.00
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I am sure the happier times will return and soon |
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Ian Butler |
Posted on 12-06-2014 20:21
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Tour de France Champion
Posts: 21854
Joined: 01-05-2012
PCM$: 400.00
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VoetsT - Just the same casual Ian Butler tales
cunego59 - I see your concern. But there's no need for it, the story will be with at least as many ups as downs Thing is, this is the period right after the war, so pessimism is the general factor for that time. It'll turn around
Martial1 - Very opposite paths
Shonak - Everybody did, I reckon. Time to start building up again!
sutty68 - Damn right |
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cunego59 |
Posted on 13-06-2014 00:01
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Team Manager
Posts: 6508
Joined: 14-09-2008
PCM$: 1090.00
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Yeah, I thought so, and I know you two are experienced story writers, so it wasn't a real concern I just have the feeling that there's a small trend in stories to implement drama at all costs, and I thought some constructive criticism cannot hurt. I'm looking forward to the ups
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Jakstar22 |
Posted on 13-06-2014 00:06
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Team Leader
Posts: 7294
Joined: 11-04-2012
PCM$: 200.00
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Drama!! I LOVE IT!!!. Can't wait for the racing though
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547984 |
Posted on 13-06-2014 00:25
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Grand Tour Specialist
Posts: 5008
Joined: 29-01-2013
PCM$: 200.00
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And now it was just the two of us left.
Intentional...or no?
baseballlover312, 06-03-14 : "Nuke Moscow...Don't worry Russia, we've got plenty of love to go around your cities"
Sarah Palin, 08-03-14 (CPAC, on Russian aggression) : "The only thing that stops a bad guy with a nuke is a good guy with a nuke"
Big thanks to jdog for making this AMAZING userbar!
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Ian Butler |
Posted on 13-06-2014 07:55
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Tour de France Champion
Posts: 21854
Joined: 01-05-2012
PCM$: 400.00
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cunego59 - I can't agree more We'll surely keep an eye on it.
Jakstar22 - Around the time that PCM 14 gets released, the first races should come!
547984 - Actually, by accident |
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Mresuperstar |
Posted on 13-06-2014 11:59
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Grand Tour Champion
Posts: 8058
Joined: 22-06-2009
PCM$: 650.00
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I laid in bed waiting. 5 minutes later, a knock on my door. (...)
"I'm ready, let me have it Joseph. What do you want to know?
You're old enough now to be able to understand and handle the truth."
Travis stood tall in the middle of my door frame. I had so many question.
But, I feared any answer he would give wasn't going to fill the void in my heart.
"Well, you can start with the two questions asked during dinner -
Why did you and mom get a divorce? And, where have you been?"
He shut the door, took a deep breath, and then spoke.
"Chloe and I got a divorce because I took PEDs during my time as professional cyclist nearly two decades ago. She said she could no longer trust me..."
"Come on, a professional cyclist? That's the best you got?
Just stop now, I don't want to be lied to once again."
"I'm not lying, Chloe and I didn't tell you about my past to protect you."
"Protect me from what? The fact you were so bad that you had to cheat
to win in a sport that nobody really cares about? Wow, thanks a lot dad."
"Hold on, let me finish. While I was making my comeback into the sport
after a 1-year doping suspension, the war prematurely cut my career short.
I was drafted into the US Army, you were about 2 years old at that time."
"But, where have you been and why were you so called 'protecting' me?"
"Joseph, just calm down. I'm getting there, let me finish."
Edited by Ian Butler on 14-06-2014 06:54
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kqyt |
Posted on 13-06-2014 12:05
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Neo-Pro
Posts: 348
Joined: 31-08-2012
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over 3k views already
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sutty68 |
Posted on 13-06-2014 13:59
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Tour de France Champion
Posts: 34654
Joined: 22-08-2010
PCM$: 200.00
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Can't wait to see what he was protecting him from |
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Martial1 |
Posted on 13-06-2014 18:16
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Neo-Pro
Posts: 388
Joined: 30-04-2014
PCM$: 200.00
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"in a sport that nobody really cares about"
That's a bit harsh |
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